“In the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
Be gentle with yourself, they have said.
Remember you are a fragile soul, I have read.
Even the kindest words can be poison.
Because I have only listened to those words when fear or grief has caused me pain.
And instead of making me healthier, they caused a kind of paralysis.
Because sometimes we need to be gentle with ourselves, and sometimes we need permission to play small.
But now that we are grown-up, most times we need know that we are strong and capable and that we have what it takes to take the next step.
Most times the best course of action is not to stay fragile.
Most times the best course of action is to put on our big girl pants or our invisible crown and prove to ourselves that we have got this.
It’s our internal Supernanny that we need, not our fairy godmother.
Take the chance. Make the leap. Sit on the naughty step. Get off your ass. Clean your house. Eat your greens. Play bigger. Get dressed. Make the call. Move your body. Do the math. Book the ticket. Take responsibility.
You’ve got this.
“Your soul knows.”
Retreat happened this weekend; re-entry is happening now. What can you say after spending three days with a group of irreverent, sacred, sassy, gentle, fierce, wise, silly, gorgeous, talented, creative, sensitive, remarkable women?
Sas, Penny, Susannah, Lisa, Emma, Leonie, Jo (and the Fox):
Thank you -
For being you.
For seeing me.
Photos by Penny McKinley-Rodgers
“There is a vitality, a life-force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique.” - Martha Graham
Dear Ms. Graham,
Quickening is bloody uncomfortable. My body is full of equal parts excitement, terror and motion sickness. My tried-and-true neural pathways are disagreeing with you and reading this feeling as fear rather than vitality.
“Eat!” My ego is screaming.
“You can’t handle this. It is too big. Food will numb you. Grab a spoon and eat Nutella straight out of the jar. Don’t even move away from the open cupboard door. The faster you can get it in the sooner this feeling of terror/ possibility will pass.”
“Who are you to think about getting bigger?”
“Who are you to think about being capable of more?”
“The way things are is easier.”
“Why does it matter anyway? You aren’t special. What you have to say doesn’t matter.”
“Tomorrow is soon enough. There is plenty of time to do it then.”
“Go ahead, watch that re-run. You’re tired. You’ve earned a rest.”
But there is another tiny voice there that has been getting stronger and stronger. It wants me to listen to the quickening. It wants me to ride the feeling through to the end. It is telling me that I can handle it. In fact, it thinks I have the potential to Rock It.
“There is a vitality, a life-force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep open and aware directly to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open.” - Martha Graham
Dear Ms. Graham,
I hear you, and I will.